Tricks, Not Treats: How To Survive Halloween
Short people in disguises may be knocking on your door at the end of the month.
No, they aren’t coming for cash or to convert your religious beliefs. They just want candy. Lots and lots of candy.
It’s Halloween and if you are planning a night in, you might have your work cut out for you.
As the owner of a house with a door people knock on, you are obligated to provide said candy or face certain consequences – including trees decorated with toilet paper, eggs thrown at your home, or a flaming bag of something dire left on your stoop.
For some of us, having a bowl of candy by the door spells doom for our waistlines. You face this yearly responsibility to your neighborhood’s youths even though you may not want to, but you’ve got to do it, for the kids. Those terrifying kids…
Provide the treats or face the tricks, because that’s the law.
How will you do it? Do you have the willpower to avoid those candy-corned, snack sized, lollipopped temptations? It’s you versus your sweet tooth versus the devils and ghosts and monsters walking up your sidewalk in the chilled night air. Who will win?
You can, if you know the right tricks, and you don’t have to be a witch to make them work. Here’s how to survive Halloween…
It’s not for you, silly.
No one said you have to get the candy you like. Get the stuff that you’re not a big fan of. There are literally thousands of options, and you don’t have to use this day as an excuse to stock up for yourself.
You could go healthy.
Does it have to be candy? Someone needs to pass out boxes of raisins, also known as nature’s candy.
Who said it has to be edible?
Depending on your street’s demographic, you could go with crayons, or glow sticks, costume jewelry, or whatever the local dollar store has in appropriate abundance.
Or, get crafty.
Plenty of DIY sites online have fun little favors you can make on the cheap that could impress the youngin’s. Have a pre-Halloween party with some friends to make a bunch of clever trinkets. And remember on the big night that theatrics can really make or break it. That necklace isn’t some wire and string you cobbled together; it’s a good luck charm!
You have a lot of options to survive the night.
Of course, you could just leave the light off and pretend to not be home. That’s probably the easiest… if you’re too scared to face the night.